For anyone who doesn’t know: for the last 6 months. I have been experiencing an increasing number of unexplained seizures. We had many dr. appointments, tests, and ER visits to try and figure out why they were happening. This past weekend I was admitted to the epilepsy unit at the hospital to determine if my seizures were epileptic or non-epileptic.
Just before heading into London I prayed and asked God for 3 things:
- That I wouldn’t need to stay in the hospital very long (even though we were told it would take 5-10 days).
- That I wouldn’t need to take medication.
- That I would just get better quickly and easily.
At that point, the chances of any of those things happening seemed impossible and I was told several times ‘not to get my hopes up because that probably wouldn’t happen’. But nothing is impossible with God! God doesn’t always answer our prayers in the way we would like him to, but in this case He did, and as soon as the words left my mouth, I was certain that He would.
I was in the hospital for 3 days (didn’t need to stay long: answer to prayer #1) when they had gathered up enough information from my VEEG to confirm a diagnosis. The official diagnosis is Non-epileptic Seizures. Basically, this means that at the time when the seizures started I probably had some stress built up in my life. Then, as I began to have more seizures I would become more stressed about why they were happening and as a result I would have more seizures. That became a vicious cycle with more stress building up after more seizures.
There is no set treatment for the seizures. Most peoples seizures stop right after they are diagnosed because an enormous weight is lifted off their shoulders once that they finally know what is happening to them! (healing quickly: answer to prayer #3)
We have been told that my seizures would stop within a few weeks just on their own! With no medication, no therapy…nothing! They will just stop! What an amazing answer to prayer(#2)!
The next step in recovery is learning how to recognize and manage stress better so that I can prevent future seizures. It may take a little time and work, but at least now we know what’s causing them and what we need to do.
I believe that my healing is nothing short of a miracle from God. When we think of miracles we usually think of instantaneous healing but other times God gives them a little more time. Maybe that is because we could not handle it at once or maybe it is because God wants us to learn how to really keep depending on Him-I don’t know.What I DO know is that “In all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.” (Romans 8:28) I’m not sure why I had to wait so long to get diagnosed but God’s hand was in the waiting and It was for my good.
In Matthew 14, When Peter was starting to walk on the water towards Jesus, what made Him afraid? It was the same waves and wind as when he got out of the boat, but as the winds blew and the waves rose Peter took his eyes off Jesus. He stopped believing that Christ alone could keep him safe on the water.
Nobody enjoys the thought of waiting on Gods perfect timing while we are going through a painful trial. Sometimes it can be so difficult to look at our seeming impossible situation and believe that God is still in control and working things out. Despite all the frustrations through the past 6 months, God has been showing himself to me and giving me little glimpses of hope throughout the whole journey, but as soon as we look to our own power and strength to overcome a struggle, we will never be enough.
If you are going through a situation that seems impossible to you, remember to keep your eyes focused on God. True peace comes from knowing God will never fail you, no matter how impossible your situation seems.